Grace: Last Wednesday, Ivan took me in for my 6-month neuropsychological evaluation. For those of you who might be wondering, neuropsychology is “the study of the relationship between behavior, emotion, and cognition on the one hand, and brain function on the other.” Don’t feel bad – I definitely had to Google that one too! 🙂 The short story is that the right frontal-lobe brain injury (TBI) I suffered at the time of the accident, combined with the damage from the 2 strokes, produces…well…issues. As in lots of issues. The projected recovery time for my level of TBI is 2 years, but during that time I am being followed by neuropsych to monitor the healing process as time passes. So, I had one test back in January before I was discharged from the hospital, my 6-month follow-up was last Wednesday, and I will have a concluding series of tests in December 2018 to determine what my final level of brain function will be, as well as to identify any permanent deficits that may remain.

So…what exactly happened last Wednesday? I had a four hour series of tests. Four hours. And by tests, I mean active tests, not passive medical testing like an MRI or a blood test or something. The questions were endless: computer tests, memory games, vocabulary, math, puzzles, and much much more….thankfully, so much more that I don’t even remember most of it at this point!  I don’t think I ever took four hours of tests in college or when I started grad school, so it is both humorous and odd to me that they decided to use that method to test an injured brain. But oh well, I’m definitely not a doctor, and I digress…

Ivan: The term the neuropsychologist used to describe Grace’s current condition is a “neurocognitive disorder”–that is, Grace is having cognitive difficulties caused by neurological reasons. At this point, Grace pretty much looks perfectly fine from the outside; but this term is a good reminder that Grace still has a lot of healing that needs to happen on the inside, in her brain. At the risk of stating the obvious, this healing is physical healing–not merely emotional, behavioral, or volitional. Throughout the two-year window of time that Grace mentioned, the brain will actively continue trying to heal itself by re-establishing the complex network of connections that make it possible for the different parts of the brain to communicate with each other.

This morning, Grace and I met with her neuropsych doctor, who went over the results of the intensive testing from last Wednesday. From the tests, he was able to gather that Grace had a very high-functioning brain before the accident (I could’ve told him that ;)). He was then able to compare Grace’s current condition to her “old” condition. What we discovered is that Grace’s intelligence, specifically her language skills, are pretty much just as solid as before. The areas which have declined are her mental processing speed and visual-spatial skills. Grace is now slower at processing incoming information, and slower at producing synthesized information. She also has a hard time making sense of visual information, which, for example, means that if she looks at a menu at Peet’s, she might as well be looking at hieroglyphics.

From our therapists and other doctors, we have also learned that Grace has lost the ability to filter out extraneous information. For example, if you were sitting in a coffee shop reading a book, there might be all sorts of conversations going on around you, machines would be making all sorts of noises, music might be playing through the overhead speakers, but you would be able to tune all of that out in order to focus on your book (or you might put in some earbuds and then read). Grace’s brain has a hard time doing that..imagine if your brain was trying to make sense of each and every bit of noise, sound, information, stimuli in a crowded public space…it would simply be too much.

Grace’s sense of time has also been impaired–five minutes can sometimes feel like twenty, making it even more difficult to “survive” in certain public situations (even church..). It can also be understandably stressful to not be able to gauge how long any given task will take. You or I might think, “Today I need to do this, then that, then this, then that, and I should be done by such and such a time.” But with impaired time perception, maybe it might feel like you only had ten minutes to do your taxes!

Fortunately, with most of the cognitive “speed bumps” listed above, the neuropsych doctor explained that these are typical for people with severe head injuries. Though he can’t tell how much Grace will get back, he was fairly certain that Grace will continue to recover throughout the next 18 months or so. Grace and I, and our families, are grateful for new information and insights which will help us better understand and navigate through our situation. We are, as always, ever more and more grateful for your love, prayers, and support! And we will continue trusting in our loving, sovereign, faithful, powerful, gracious and merciful God. To Him be the glory! 🙂

Grace: It’s so crazy to think that today marks exactly 7 months from the accident! It definitely seems more like a lifetime ago. And, on the subject of 7’s, the past 7 days have brought us through another transitional period, including highs and also a low, that ends with us writing this post from our new apartment, after spending our first night there last night!

Low: Ivan was in Indiana for all of the past week attending a Music For All Summer Symposium. Haha, well actually this might count as a high for Ivan (we’ll see what he writes below!) since it included music and travel and was his first official job assignment from Valley Christian (VCS), but from the wife perspective…I missed him far more than I could possibly write here. Any change in routine is difficult for me, plus the fact that he’s been by my side continuously since December, plus the fact that we’re married. So yeah.

High: Therapy officially started back this week! In case I haven’t said it here before, I actually love therapy. As always, we continue to be amazed by the quality and quantity of care available here (for example, getting 60 min personal sessions here vs. 60 min with a group class in SoCal).  It’s been so refreshing to be able to discuss realistic neurological recovery goals as a young adult instead of just being guided by traditional benchmarks that were drawn from an older age group (75% of strokes occur in people over the age of 65). So we were feeling lots of hope last week!

High: Family support! I enjoyed my final week at my parents’ condo last week…I can’t say enough about how amazing our month-long stay there has been. Obviously, I love them just because they’re my family (plus they own a cat!) , but they’ve been serving and supporting us the whole way since December… and then went super above-and-beyond this week: taking me to Kaiser multiple times, helping get the last details of our apartment fixed up before Ivan got home, being patient with me when I had episodes or was just struggling with Ivan being gone, planning fun activities to pass the time…not to mention helping Ivan get to and from the airport in spite of his inconvenient flight times. THANK YOU GUYS!!!

Final High: Ivan is safely home now!!!!! ❤

Ivan: Wow, I can’t believe it’s been seven months! Going through this accident and all its ramifications is like stepping to the other side of a transparent curtain…once you’re on the other side, you can look back on your “previous” life, but everything looks different now, and you can’t go back. Good thing we have an omniscient, omnipotent Shepherd to follow! 😉

To borrow a quote from a certain famous hobbit, it’s probably safe to say that lately Grace and I have felt a bit like “butter scraped over too much bread.” Our mental and physical energies have been pushed almost to the limit, and at times it feels like we are constantly pushing a boulder up a hill, only to see the boulder roll down again…but we are discovering that through the Spirit of God there is always an undercurrent of grace in our lives that produces renewed strength, moments of peace and joy, and thanksgiving.

I spent last week at Ball State University in Muncie, Indiana, learning about the wonderful world of percussion! As a pianist, it was fascinating to jump headfirst into what seemed like a whole new world, a different sub-culture of music than what I was used to, but I was very grateful to VCS for allowing me to attend, to help me prepare for some of my teaching duties this upcoming year. I was so proud of how well Grace handled this past week! It wasn’t a smooth ride the whole way through, but she put every ounce of effort she had into it and God brought us back together again last Saturday.

This may be a good opportunity for me to give an overview of how Grace is currently doing, at the seven month mark. As we continue to work with medical professionals toward Grace’s long-term recovery, we are still gaining new information and insights about our overall situation. Here is what we know: orthopedically, Grace is doing well! The bones in her legs have healed well, and Grace has been able to walk on her own, without assistance, for at least two months or so now. The original prediction was for September. Praise God! While she probably will experience pain in her legs for the rest of her life, nowadays we have only minimal continuing care on the orthopedic front.

The issues that remain are neurological, and cognitive/behavioral. On the neurological front, Grace still has no feeling in her left hand, which limits the extent to which she can be an independent adult (personal care, cooking, household activities, etc.). Through therapy and lots of hard work, Grace can move the fingers of her left hand, but without the actual sense of touch most things are still too dangerous to do.

The cognitive/behavioral side of things is probably the most complicated to try to explain. The traumatic brain injury (TBI) that Grace experienced affected her frontal lobe, which has affected her ability to process and structure information. Specifically, Grace still needs an outside source/person to help her know what to do next. Also, too much information/stimulation still causes her brain to “shut down”–hence, no church attendance yet. All of this is difficult to describe using words, and even I am still learning the best ways to help provide structure for her on a daily basis.

Some of you may have wondered: “How can Grace write so well in her blogs if her brain is still injured?” The answer is that, thank God, the part of her brain where her intellect and natural gift for writing is found has not been damaged (as far as we can tell). It is located in a different part of the brain than the part that was injured.

So Grace is still Grace. She is still kind, God-focused, incredibly smart and talented, funny, extraordinarily perseverant and hard-working, and beautiful in every way possible. She tries her best in everything she does, and is choosing patience every day. I could not be more proud of her. I think only God will ever know just how hard the challenges she faces every day are, but I am honored that I can walk with her. Thank you all for continuing to walk with us! At this point, Grace’s recovery will progress at a much slower rate than initially, in the first couple months, so there may be more time in between updates. But we will continue to trust God and rely on Him, and we will always be thankful to know that so many brothers and sisters in Christ are continuing to lift us up in prayer! Thank you all. God is good! 🙂

Yesterday marked my 30th Sunday not in church….I could be wrong, but as far as I can remember, the most consecutive Sundays I missed in my “previous life” was 2.

One January afternoon, I remember asking Ivan to see if he could check me out of my rehab hospital to make it to church that Sunday.  Obviously, I was too foggy to process that I could barely transfer from my bed to my wheelchair, much less make it in and out of a car and through a service at a church that was 45 min away. He said no. (Also, I’m pretty sure the hospital would have said no for him in case he was wavering.) But anyway, that marked the beginning of this 6 month journey of figuring out how to worship God consistently on my own, apart from the communal gatherings I’d known my whole life. Thankfully, even though church is an essential part of growth and accountability and encouragement, God lives in hearts, not in church buildings. And, being sovereign and omnipotent, He knows that there are varieties of reasons why someone may not be able to attend church regularly – and provides for those needs too!

For me, the initial barrier seemed mostly physical, but after I learned how to navigate with my wheelchair – and eventually walk – we realized just how much neurological/brain healing must take place in order for me to handle all the sights, sounds, and interpersonal stimuli that come with attending church. So what have I been up to spiritually, then? 

Well, Step 1 was to learn to listen through a sermon or podcast-type thing at home. It took me a while to be able to focus enough to make it through an entire one, but I did! And I can now say I’m pretty hooked on Alistair Begg’s 25 min. Sunday evening podcasts. Step 1.5 was getting reacclimatized to listening to music – including praise music. It’s true that I’m probably biased from my violin background, but it’s amazing how just one song can totally reset your attitude and uplift your outlook on the day.  And then there’s Step 2: praying. Pretty important, right? I was surprised at first to notice that my mind got lost rapidly whenever I tried praying on my own. I could make it through a short “Thank you for the food” or “please help this appointment to go well”, but that was about it. Enter: the Psalms! Thousands of years ago, God provided a whole book of prayers written down for us to meditate on and worship through. Well, verse by verse, they reminded me of things to say “thank you” for – or request – and they also ended up being great templates to follow as I tried to exercise my “prayer muscle” and make it through longer prayers on my own. The great news is that not only did this “prayer therapy” work, but it also ended up being such an uplifting and inspiring exercise that I plan to keep up with it indefinitely now. Step 3 would be actually attending a service! While the estimated timeframe for achieving Step 3 is still pending, every Sunday is one Sunday closer!   in the meantime I’m thankful for the hope of  God’s nearness that He constantly offers…even when it calls for unorthodox approaches.

Grace: “A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord determines his steps.” (Proverbs 16:9) We’ve only been up here in lovely San Jose for about 18 days, but we’re excited – and surprised! – to announce that we’ve already found a new place to call home. Originally, the plan as I knew it was to move up and stay with my parents for at least the summer, giving us time to rest from the initial move, get established with Kaiser, get to to know the area, and do a thorough apartment hunt before Ivan starts working full-time in August. It seemed like a great plan on our end, and we were thankful that the offer to stay with my parents took away the pressure to “hit the ground running” as soon as we arrived. Also, my parents had warned us that the housing market was pretty competitive and fast-paced, so our expectations of being quick enough to spot and nab the right place on the first try were fairly low.

But once we arrived,  Ivan (who has learned throughout these last 6 months that “success” most often does involve a running start) started browsing some listings online anyway, just to get a feel for what was out there. That first night, he spotted a first-floor unit in a new complex….a complex that was literally a block away from my parents’ condo and about 5 minutes away from Kaiser. This seemed beyond too good to be true, so he put it on hold, and he and my mom went to look at it the next day. By the end of that day, he had signed a lease, and we were some surprised but grateful new apartment renters!

This past week we’ve been slowly unpacking boxes and getting our things settled, in addition to keeping up with Kaiser. Correction – Ivan has been doing most of the unpacking, and I’ve been “supervising” and managing the Pandora playlists. And admiring his unpacking and assembly skills. Since Valley Christian will be sending Ivan to a music symposium in Indiana for a week starting June 25th, our plan is to finish getting everything ready at the new place before he leaves but stay settled with my parents until his return, then officially start living there July 2nd.

This was definitely not our vision of how June would turn out, but God’s way has proved so much more generous and abounding than anything we would have thought to hope for. It’s moments like these that remind me to be thankful that He – not me, or Ivan, or anyone else – is the One who’s actually deciding what each day will bring.

Ivan: Amen to that! 🙂

Trying vs. succeeding. I think those two words pretty much encapsulate the story of most people’s lives – and also highlight how God has been changing my life radically in the past 6 months. For whatever reason, up until last year,  God allowed my life to be generally made up of successes. Not totally of course, but without doubt more than I could have hoped for. To recap briefly, at the end of high school I got into the music conservatory I wanted with the scholarship we needed to make it work… and when God showed me that a performing career wasn’t where I’d be most free to follow Him, He provided another scholarship at a Christian school where I could live at home. The rest of college went great, and in spite of transferring in sophomore year and changing my major, I graduated on time (with a job lined up)…and got to marry my best friend 7 months later. It would be hard to make up that amount of trying, all followed by positive outcomes, even in my most ambitious  imagination!

And then December happened. Now my life is about trying always – and succeeding sometimes. Re-learning talking, eating, and walking came after lots and lots of trying (and praying!), but they did come. Success.  There’s been an equal (if not greater) amount of therapy, trying, and praying spent on waking up the nerves in my left hand, but that seems unlikely to happen now. Trying. Visiting with a friend at home or going out to a new place takes lots of mental trying and exertion.  Sometimes my brain cooperates and things go well (success), but unfortunately sometimes that doesn’t  happen – in spite of the trying involved. Ivan and the rest of my family do a great job trying to help me mentally, emotionally, and physically, and I couldn’t ask for any greater effort…but even that sometimes yields mixed results.

The point of all of this struck me again recently with greater impact – and hopefully it can encourage some of you too. A life – any life – can’t be measured by just the number of successes. I’m trying as hard at living as I ever have (honestly, probably harder than I ever have!) but the outcome – that is, the success of my trying –  is out of my hands in a lot of ways. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t. I think God is showing me that, because of Christ, He measures me not by my success, but simply by having a heart that tries.

After all, isn’t that why Jesus came? He succeeded on my behalf because He knew that even my best attempt to reach Him couldn’t come close to His perfect measure. He died so that His life would cover my tries with His successes. And what about the hearts (mine included, sometimes) that don’t even try to be close to His? By His grace, His Spirit can intervene and succeed for them, and transform them into hearts that try too. The gospel makes trying and growing – sometimes even apart from succeeding – the only measure now.

Up until last week a giant question haunting both of us was: how difficult will it be to transition from Kaiser SoCal to Kaiser NorCal?? We were nervous because, unlike what we’d imagined, the two Kaiser systems are actually not connected for practical purposes – even though it’s the same state! So, in layman’s terms that means we had to start over with a new primary doctor, new prescriptions, new therapy referrals, and (crucial in my case) new specialist referrals. And anyone who’s participated in a large healthcare entity (definitely including ourselves) can attest to how easy it is to get lost in the bureaucratic side of things. So basically – we were nervous.

But I love happy endings…hopefully y’all do too! Contrary to our expectations, I got assigned a new doctor – and saw her! – by the third day after we arrived. She was incredibly understanding and proactive, started all my referrals, and agreed to finish up some paperwork pending from Riverside. And guess what? We got into neurology the morning after her referral! (In case y’all don’t remember, I couldn’t even get a neurology appointment in SoCal after I was hospitalized for the TIA at the beginning of May. So giant difference in service there!)

And it gets even better…our new neurologist was also super proactive, and ordered an additional CT angiogram for my carotid artery, since he felt like the previous scans were not as comprehensive as possible, and didn’t rule out the possibility of an additional new clot. This artery has been dissected since the accident, which was what caused my two strokes and possibly the TIA. We’ve learned that this type of dissection isn’t surgically reparable, so now the important goal is to monitor it regularly and find a medication plan that’s consistently effective.  But I’m super thankful for a new doctor who wanted to go above and beyond the standard scans just to be safe!

And so, yesterday morning, we got up bright snd early and headed over to Kaiser to prep for the CT angiogram. Besides the fact that no one really wants to start their Monday with an IV of iodine (doesn’t really hurt, but makes all your veins feel weirdly hot), the scan went well, took less time than we expected, and we even got the results from the doctor by yesterday afternoon! Praise God, there were no new blockages in the artery. Although it’s still dissected (it’s been at functioning at 50% since December), we can keep my current medication plan and move forward with a follow up in a couple of months.

Tomorrow we get to meet my new physical and occupational therapists, but after all the excellent treatment we’ve gotten in the past week, I’m not nervous at all – just excited. We’ve seen the hand of God in so many dimensions of our move to San Jose, and our new Kaiser experiences have been no exception. Thank you to everyone who’s been praying for this aspect of our new start. God truly answers prayers for all the details of life – big and small – and we’re so thankful for another burden that He’s chosen to remove by His amazing grace.

Ivan: This afternoon brought yet another blessing to thank God for…I am extremely grateful and excited to announce that I have accepted a position as Conservatory Teacher at Valley Christian Schools! 🙂 Only God could have opened the door for such a wonderful opportunity, and I am eagerly anticipating the beginning of the school year in August. A few months ago, when we realized that Grace would not be able to return to work, we started to pray that God would provide a full-time job for me, as my multiple part-time jobs would not provide the medical insurance we needed. Thus began an extensive job search, in which I pursued both musical and non-musical jobs. The fact that God has granted a job in my field, after the completion of my master’s degree, and furthermore in a Christ-honoring environment, is such an incredible blessing!

Tomorrow marks exactly six months since the accident, and it is somewhat mind-boggling to look back and reflect on just how far God has brought us. He is truly the God of the valley and the mountain, the ever-present help in time of trouble and the joy of our salvation. There is always so much to thank and praise Him for. Our journey is far from over, but we are thanking God for the opportunity to keep focusing on His faithful provision as we continue moving forward! Thank you all as always for continuing to walk with us 🙂

Grace: One of the less-published aspects of our journey over the past 6 months has been the ever-present job search. It became clear at the beginning of February that we had transitioned from a dual-income to single-income home, and we began fervently praying (and on Ivan’s end searching) for an opportunity that would meet our new needs – needs that now included rather specialized healthcare coverage. As a wife, it was an amazing blessing to watch Ivan accept and tackle this next hurdle (in addition to working, finishing school, and taking care of me), but my heart felt a mixture of gratitude and sadness as I also observed his willingness to pursue literally any position to provide for us – even if it meant laying aside his musical goals and not using his new degree. In this context, you can imagine our amazement and joy to watch God provide not only a job in Ivan’s field, but also one that is part of an amazing Christian school…a school that is literally 10 minutes away from my parents’ house! Wow. We truly serve an awesome God!

There’s still a lot to sort out this summer: housing, getting established in the Kaiser Northern California medical system (believe it or not, for practical purposes Kaiser NorCal is not really connected to Kaiser SoCal), and as always, more therapy… but watching the employment burden lifted from Ivan’s shoulders in such a unbelievable way has filled us with new hope and energy to keep trusting God as we seek to navigate these challenges and integrate into our new community. I can’t think of a better way to end our first week in San Jose!

Grace: We’re finally here! That’s so hard to believe! Some amazing friends helped us load up all our earthly possessions Sunday afternoon, my Dad flew in Sunday night, and Monday morning found us on the road. My Dad was “truck master”, with  Ivan piloting our little Yaris, plus myself in said Yaris.  It’s probably best to skip over the gory details of the actual drive up (suffice it to say that traveling is much less than ideal with continuing brain issues), but Monday evening found us safely at my parents’ condo, enjoying a delicious “welcome-to-San-Jose” meal. Yesterday was a great relax-and-recover-from-the-move day (at least for me–Ivan unloaded the truck in the morning and had some meetings in the afternoon), and we’re enjoying starting our first normal day in San Jose on this lovely Wednesday. We cannot thank God and all of you enough for the prayers, support, and the service that made this move possible. It’s truly an act of providence and mercy! On a side note, I had thought it was impossible to move in two weeks, but nevertheless Ivan did that pretty much singlehandedly….. while taking me to therapy, and dealing with all of the unpleasant things surrounding a move, plus the unusual unpleasant things that come with attempting a move with my current condition. I’m so beyond proud of him! And again, praise God, who truly was the One that made all things possible!

Ivan: We’re here! So grateful to God for a safe trip to San Jose. We already miss all our friends from SoCal, but are still grateful for everyone’s continued love, prayers, and support, even from far away! And we’re really excited to meet new friends here in SJ, and to be able to personally thank all of you who have been faithfully praying for us! God is gracious and merciful, and we thank Him for ordering our steps day by day. It is such a comfort to know that all I am responsible for–all we are responsible for–is to follow Him, and He will lead us home. Thank You, Lord Jesus! Soli Deo gloria.

This is the beginning of an unusual week. Exciting, but still unusual. As Ivan wrote to you all last week, we are beyond grateful that God has provided a way for us to join our families – and new extended church family – up north…especially since our recent “hospital adventure” confirmed that life will probably be safer and easier if I can be physically with or at least close to a family member while Ivan is away at work. Praise God for providing for us step by step!

On the other hand, these two transition weeks (or “packing weeks” if you happen to be Ivan!) have also become processing and grieving weeks for me. I think for the first time since the accident, I have been able to think through what happened  and open my eyes more not only to God’s provision but also to what was lost. Let’s start with the good things: I have both my legs (yes, even that was at risk once), I can walk, I can move my left arm and hand, I can swallow, talk, eat, think, etc. My balance is getting better, and I can even go for short walks outside! My brain can tolerate listening to music again. I can take care of most personal care. It’s not hard to remember a time when I did none of those things. However, I’m still haunted by some things too. Obviously, we don’t really know why this happened at all. I don’t have feeling in my left hand, and as time passes it becomes less likely that I will. This has separated me from a lot that I love – most importantly violin (including 17 years of study and 2 years living in New York at a conservatory), but also cooking, or even many chores and normal “wife things” I used to be proud of. Church, school, and most social activities are off the table for now, and since the average traumatic brain injury (TBI) recovery time is 1-2 years, we’re barely a quarter of the way through that.  Dealing with TBI is a complicated daily struggle that Ivan and I – and my mom when she was here – have gotten better at but are still trying to figure out. Pertinent example: I think this  last week has taught us that moving definitely falls into the category of “what not to do with TBI,” but nevertheless, this is where God is taking us! And I know it will be fantastic when we finally arrive.

So, circling back, my first reaction to the sudden, recent introduction to grief was to try to “fix myself” back to my normal outlook. After all, these moments before Ivan and I dive into our new life should be filled with celebration and anticipation, not sadness, right? But I don’t think anyone can “schedule in” grief to a convenient day or two somewhere, and I’m definitely learning that I can’t just arbitrarily “fix myself.” God knew what He was doing by shielding my mind and heart from sadness before, and He knows what He’s doing by opening up my ability to think and feel more deeply now. Grief is part of life…it says that in the Bible more places than I can count!…and God designed humans with this potential for a reason.  I know we’re not even remotely close to the final paragraph of our story, and my prayer is that He will use this new emotional component to dig deeper into my heart (and Ivan’s too), and keep equipping us for the plan that’s being unveiled inch by inch. Besides, who says that grieving and celebrating are mutually exclusive? Even as my heart mourns for all the parts of my old self that seem gone, and the perennial “why?” of the accident that I wonder if anyone will ever know for sure….just typing the list of “good things” in the last paragraph reminded me of how much I’ve been given back that we had no guarantees for at the beginning of this year. God is good…and I know once we get to San Jose I’ll have more things than I can count to keep adding to my “good things” list. So stay tuned! 🙂

Yesterday, we had an insightful visit with my regular neurologist following our unexpected hospital stay earlier this week. But before getting into that, we want to express how much your concern and support blessed both of us after the hospital update! We received so many messages, texts, and comments, reminding us that we still have an army of godly friends and family who are lifting us up in prayer daily…and that means the world to us! I also firmly believe it has made all the difference in the speed and success of my recovery up to this point (friendly reminder – back in February my projected “fully able to walk” month was September!). So thank you all for staying with us and striving on our behalf, even in unexpected twists and turns! Also, special shout-out to my mom who had planned to come back down Monday to move my sister out of CBU, but instead jumped right into the hospital scenario, stayed with us to help stabilize things for a couple of days, and still moved my sister out of her dorm on time – in spite of  being sick on top of everything. Thanks, Mom!

And now onto the crucial neuro details. As you may (but I hope may not) have experienced, neurology is an incredibly overbooked and difficult-to-penetrate specialty. So difficult, in fact, that even with a hospitalization and TIA diagnosis, the best they could do for us was schedule a phone consultation for yesterday morning. Neither Ivan nor I felt like a 5-7 minute phone call was going to be thorough enough to come up with a good treatment plan after my unexpected downturn, so we were struck with a crazy idea. Obviously, my neurologist had reserved time to call us…so what if we just showed up at his office at that time and asked to talk with him in person?? Not likely we would make it past the front desk, but still worth a try.

So that is exactly what we did. In spite of all the odds, skeptical nurses,  and the fact that he was completely booked for the day, our neurologist not only saw us, but gave me a full exam and spent time reviewing my brain and artery scans from Monday and Tuesday. What an answer to prayer – and a nice doctor! Here’s what he came up with:

1) He generally agreed with the TIA diagnosis at the hospital, and upped my blood thinner dosage in order to prevent any future TIA/stroke events.
2) On the other hand, he also mentioned that TIAs and partial-onset seizures share some similar symptoms. I’ve been on a low-dose seizure medication trial for a month because my March EEG came back as somewhat abnormal, and because he suspected that some of my TBI “anxiety episodes” might actually be seizure activity. Given this background, and because I continue to have “episodes” on a fairly regular basis outside of the extreme symptoms on Monday, he decided to increase this medication as well. This will insure he is better addressing my more regular difficulties, even though the Monday episode was still most likely a TIA.

Moving forward, we’ll take another month to see how my body responds to both these medication changes, then meet back again in early July to decide on the most effective treatment plan to stick with. Ivan and I are curious to figure out what that will end up looking like…but in the meantime, we’re very thankful for a kind and thorough doctor, and for a new medication plan that we hope will keep life safer and more normal!